As I was sitting and watching Micah tonight I was amazed at how much he has grown and changed lately. He is definitely a sleep fighter - a night owl, like his mama. He constantly wants to be on the ground crawling, or as I have come to call it "scrawling", because he pulls himself with his left hand and pushes with his right foot. More or less scooting/crawling. Now this effectively and automatically ruins his clothes, as he is sliding around on his belly. I hear that is just a glimpse of the laundry mishaps boys get into. He can wave, patty cake, and peekaboo. Only wants real table food now and becomes increasingly angry if I still try to feed him baby food. He has 1 tooth and can say a few words (bye bye, mama, dada, and bite bite) sometimes - I think! He is just growing up. It always seems to hit me at once instead of over time when my babies are moving more toward toddlerhood and out of the baby stages. It is a little bittersweet at times.
I think back to Keri-lyn as a baby and sometimes it seem like such a long time ago. Other times it seems like a few days. Each of my children are constantly suprising me with little glimpses of the maturity they are gaining. Like when I woke up today to 3 year old Layna saying "Apparently it's morning. Get up!" Or when 5 year old Jaycee shows such concern and loyalty to a friend from pre-k that we have been worried about that she prays for her and her family every night. Keri-lyn is very much the little book worm. She can read for hours upon hours. She is the little mother hen for sure, but can still be goofy at times.
I have been worried a little about keeping my children to sheltered lately. As a parent, I want them to be well adjusted at school and not be culture shocked every time they leave the house. Well, as of yesterday, God has relieved me of that burden. Our current situation has put us around some different types of people and families, and I think that is helping the kids to realize that we should love the people around us but we don't have to act like them. I hope our time here helps my family to be more thankful of what we have and more aware of how we can help others. I want us to really start making more of an effort to reach out to those who don't have what we have. Not just physically, but spiritually. I hope that we will be good examples of God's love.
It's funny in a sad way, that the people I really struggle with are people like I used to be. Addicts, who really aren't bad people, but are so caught up in their addiction that everyone else sort of fades into the background. People like this used to be some of my best friends. I wonder when I started thinking of myself as so much better than them that I rarely try to find a way to reach out to them instead of putting them down in my mind. How easily I have forgotten that God's grace and mercy are the only things that pulled me out of some very dark places.
"Lord, please soften my heart to the needs of others you put in my life. Help me to be a comfort and a friend to those who need one. And give me a forgiving spirit, because I was forgiven."
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